Saturday, December 30, 2006

little match girl

it was the last night of the year.

it isn't yet, but it's pretty close and tonight i was thinking of deebs, who even as a grownup used to cry if you said that first sentence. fortunately, the older sister wasn't usually present to deliver the torment and for some reason i was too kind although kindness isn't really my thing.

i think i may never be warm again; i started being realy cold somewhere around two o'clock this afternoon and even though i've had a hot shower, i'm not really caught up. maybe tomorrow i'll have a sauna.

i'm home from the party, even though the party will be gong on until monday around noon. i considered staying, but i have church in the morning and plans on monday. besides, i've had some insomniac nights and i need the rest.

i don't know if you've ever suffered chronic insomnia, but when you go enough nights without any restful sleep you become desperate. it is a special kind of hell to lie quietly awake and watch the hours tick by until at last it is late enough that you know painfully well that even if you fell asleep now and stayed that way until morning you still won't have enough rest to get up and go to work.

but you get up and do it anyway.


it's time for bed. wish me luck.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey, I think I know this "deebs." Maybe not, but her older sister cried when their mother insisted on reading it to her (the older sister). I thought of this line too, but on January 1st, and it was too late. And now it really makes older sister cry, because their mom died, so no one utters it anymore. Have to say, I jumped when I saw this post - just the first line, and then a little more at the next. Hope you are well.
I got my MM in c.c.


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