epiphany

so get this: i'm writing a note to rumblestrip and all of a sudden i have this Big Idea.

i used to write a lot of really good music. and these days i've been back at it. i'm starting to remember what it was like to be me back when i was really a musician, back when i had original ideas.

back before medication, before management.

and i had this thought:

maybe i'll relearn how to be that person, and i'll try to let her heal instead of trying to heal up this incomplete shell, this half-person. maybe that's where i've been going wrong. maybe that person and ONLY that person can truly be healed.

when you come to God to be forgiven you have to come with all of you, not just the parts you don't particularly care for. you get the whole treatment, like it or not. when you come to God to be made free you have to bring all of you, not just the parts you wish to release.

it must be the same when you come to be healed.

i'm starting to remember how to be me. wait a minute. let me get my things; i'm coming.