Sunday, December 26, 2010

i wuz gonna...

...get back to telling the gargantuan story but it's kind of enough for me that my furlough's up this afternoon and i have to try to beat the storm back there today and i want to tell you that my christmas gifts included items like the "don't die out there" playing card deck and the "worst case survival" daily calendar, so while i DO have an interest in outdoor survival in good years, i think there's kind of a little undercurrent going in my family's hopes for me.

*sigh*.

i'll try real hard not to disappoint them.

on other fronts, it was a lovely time and there was a lovely meal and i got to go to not one but two lovely church services with my own congregation whom i have missed mightily and i got to hear loud and clear from them in person how mightily i have been missed and if you're going to be away the best way to do it is to be missed and yet there's still this mood disorder: yesterday i was driving along to my mom's house and i was somewhere i wanted to be with a sackful of gifts i was happy about giving and basically i was really genuinely happy about everything, but yet i was still crying, which is a little unsettling.

it's less confusing when your affect matches your life circumstances; say, for instance, when there are things you're really sad about and you're crying. when that happens it's kind of a relief for me because things match up nicely, which people with mood disorders don't  have to think about so much.

so that's my story.

i gotta go finish packing.

1 comment:

Givinya De Elba said...

Oh Flask, you humble me. Thankyou for reading my little old blog. I am glad that my voice comes through as authentic in a world of other blogs! I am a Mom, I have a family, I go to church, but I am glad that I am not defined by one genre in my blog.

I also have my nasty spiky times, but due to my readership (in-laws etc!) I try to keep Killing A Fly mostly positive. I hope that doesn't skew the picture of life for my readers.

I am also glad that I don't make your CSF boil over and leak onto your carpet! That sounds like a nasty clean-up job!

I am currently listening to your arrangements - they are wonderful! You're using some software that I am a tad too dense to work out myself, and so I am in awe. I love Christmas music, and northern hemisphere music is FINE by me! While we have sweat dripping off our bodies, there's something calming about singing of a White Christmas and a Winter Wonderland. Unfortunately right now in Queensland, it's wet, miserable, foggy, boggy and soggy.

Thinking of you as you brace for another big snow. Keep warm!

Sorry about the long comment! I haven't yet found an email address for you, otherwise I'd have put all this drivel in there!

Hang in there Flask! Chat to you again sometime!

Givinya de Elba (Kate)

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