Saturday, February 11, 2012

in the unlikely event of a water landing

while we're on the topic of things unlikely to happen, if you wish to propose marriage to me, just ask. do not whip up some big theatrical production or spend your hard-earned money on a ring. do not expect me to start planning a big ceremony for a perfect princess day, either.

if you know me at all (and i'm assuming you do, if you are proposing marriage), you already know that i will prefer a quiet, private ceremony followed by a quiet, private dinner and while i may wear nylons and pretty dress and everything, don't expect much in the way of floral arrangements or jewelry.

or manageable hair.

and heaven help you if you think valentine's day would be a good time to propose!

as far as i'm concerned, valentine's day is just one more advertising campaign designed to make you buy me stuff i don't want. a diamond will not tell me how much you love me; only your commitment over time and your treatment of me in general will tell me that.

if i do not feel special to you just because it's raining or it happens to be tuesday afternoon, i will not feel special to you if you buy me something expensive for valentine's day.

diamonds! chocolate! wine! the advertising all shouts. if you spend your money on these things the girl will love you forever!

because it's not about caring or loading the dishwasher or having common interests or not noticing that i stole your favorite sweater.

it's about making you feel bad if you don't measure up to some imaginary standard and it's about making me feel unwanted unless you buy me things.

a lot of things.

expensive things.

if you were really paying attention you'd know that my favorite gifts from you are rocks you found in a parking lot and that what i REALLY want is to make your damn dinner and get to see the look on your face when dessert is THAT good.

so pardon me if i ignore valentine's day.

No comments:


Related Posts with Thumbnails