Thursday, April 05, 2012

virus

yesterday i got a shady phone call from some boilermaker call room and a guy telling me that my windows machine is sending error messages that indicate i am infected with a very, very bad virus.

am i online now? he wants to know.

now, i know that reputable companies do. not. ever. ask for information over the phone.

wow, i say. that's awesome. please tell me what company you work for and give me your contact information so i can verify you and get back to you on that.

it is a very urgent matter, he tells me. my computer could crash any second.

oh, well, then. that's another matter! i should go right away and take it to the IT department at the university.

it's very sophisticated, he tells me. undetectable. my computer guys will not be able to help me.

oh, that might be true if i were just taking it to a computer store, i agree cheerfully, but i'm pretty sure our IT guys in the computer science department at the university can put things to right.

the reason i am still on the phone with this dipstick is because the longer he is on the phone with me, the harder he is working and the less time he is spending scamming someone else.

i kept him on the phone maybe fifteen minutes before he slammed his phone down.

i already know that if my machine is sending error messages, the recipient already KNOWS the information this guy is trying to ask.

and anyway, even though i have a windows machine for use in the car, i run a mac.

which is what made today's news so unsettling.

so of course after i painted a party hat and made cracker dough and a batch of soup i ran right upstairs to find out if my machine is clean.

it is.

yay.

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