time to make fun of the robocommenters

robocommenting is big business. it is part of the grey and black hat operations of dubious little people selling SEO packages to dubious little people or with dubious little businesses and what they NEED is a lot of backlinks or to find patsies who will link farm or link exchange and what they need is for YOU, little blogger, to keep their comment on your blog so that their link is out there, because somebody's paying by the link or the view.

yeah, it would be awesome if everybody all at once got interested in my youtube videos i guess, but there's little point in buying "views" which aren't any more than a lot of clickthroughs.

i mean, really. are you telling a story here, or do you just want to show how much other people are willing to click on your link?

nevermind.

i know the answer to that.

anyway, manipulative crap meant to take advantage of people with low self-esteem or low intelligence kind of burns my butt, and you see a lont of that crap in the robocomments.

the process works like this: some shady little person who wants a lot of clickthroughs for their get-rich-quick scheme pays x amount of dollars to a black hat SEO outfit that offers bazillions of views or clickthroughs or backlinks for a price.

then the blackhatter whips up a couple of generic comments that are meant to sound like real people and they use bots or low-paid labor to paste their spam comments to a lot of blogs hoping that good natured people will allow those comments onto their blogs.

you might could just filter and delete them, but i don't. i read them, because i am fascinated by the way they try to capitalize on people's vulnerabilities.

so let's take a look at some classic stuff i've been saving, shall we?

Wow, fantastic blog layout! How lengthy have you been running a blog for? you make blogging glance easy. The total glance of your website is magnificent, as well as the content material! Feel free to visit my homepage; 

this is the generic "wow, i love your layout!" it has a popular variant that goes something like "wow, this layout is almost exactly the layout of my old blog!"

the layout of my blog is a standard blogger template with some minor adjustments. but thanks.

It's truly a great and helpful piece of info. I'm happy that you simply shared this helpful information with us. Please stay us up to date like this. Thanks for sharing. My weblog:

i'm so glad to be useful to you.  i am kind of puzzled why you consider this post to be "helpful information", but whatever.

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educational. well, that's not really a thing i would expect, but it's your education so i guess you'd know.

and i guess some people are just really, really stupid:

You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be really something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely broad for me. I am looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it! My blog post 

you keep trying. i'm sure you will eventually come to understand pudding. i know it's a struggle, but it will be worthwhile for you to gain mastery of it in the end.

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huh. if my description of the pond skimming is reading your thoughts, i have worries about you. come to think of it, you comment is slightly less coherent than a simple bad translation of a foreign language spam, so what exactly ARE your thoughts? and what's the deal with the omegas instead of w's?  is that some sort of way for you to sign your scuzzy work?

and then i noticed that some robospams are getting hostile, because apparently they think criticizing people's work will get responses and backlinks:

I think that what you composed was actually very reasonable. But, consider this, what if you added a little content? I mean, I don't want to tell you how to run your blog, but suppose you added something that grabbed people's attention? I mean "how to make awesome pudding" is a little plain. You should look at Yahoo's home page and watch how they create news headlines to grab viewers interested. You might add a video or a picture or two to grab readers interested about everything've got to say. In my opinion, it could make your posts a little livelier. My site :

mmmhm. yes, what if i added a little content? i have been thinking just that thing. flask, i says to myself: maybe you should put a little content in here and maybe be more like yahoo's home page, because that's all FULL of content and not linkbait and spam and cheap advertising. i am so glad this commenter stopped to put me on the right track, because with all of these posts and no content i was starting to wonder what the purpose of the exercise is. thank you, oh, THANK you spambot commenter, for showing me what i was missing from my content-empty blog!

and this, designed, i guess, to rile up the commenters while not saying anything specific:

I drop a comment each time I like a post on a website or I have something to contribute to the conversation. It is triggered by the passion displayed in the article I looked at. And after this post "how to make awesome pudding". I was actually moved enough to post a thought :-) I actually do have a couple of questions for you if you do not mind. Could it be only me or does it look as if like some of the comments appear like left by brain dead visitors? :-P And, if you are posting on other online social sites, I'd like to follow you. Could you make a list every one of all your communal sites like your twitter feed, Facebook page or linkedin profile? Here is my web-site -

my, but don't you sound all casual and friendly! it's like the two of us are in here together against ALL THESE LUNATICS. clearly we have a special bond.

and then there's this, and a lot like it:

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huh?

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and whut?

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*blinks eyes*

and finally:

Howdy, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam remarks? If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it's driving me insane so any help is very much appreciated. Feel free to surf to my page

really? you have a blog similar to mine? because mine covers a pretty small niche, namely THINGS I AM THINKING ABOUT. but yes, now that you mention it, i do get a lot of spam remarks. i think one of the best ways for me not to get so many spam remarks would be for you not to write them.

and no, i will not be surfing over to your webpage, even though i feel free to do so. my webpage: http://furthermoreflask.blogspot.com/